As far as how my interview went...I do not know of many people who, after an interview, get emotional because of the compliments the interviewer gave them...but I guess I am just a sap. It made me feel good to hear what she had to say after I recited my carefully memorized script- word for word.
She told me she loved my inflection and enthusiasm. Granted- when I speak to people I tend to have that overly happy roller coaster sounding way of talking. But it works well in front of massive groups of people.
The thing that stopped me was what she said in regards to my back. "We know that you have a prior back injury. We want to work with you and continue to help you strengthen your back and your general lifting ability. We have 80 lb bags of salt that we do lift, but I am going to have you perform other duties in adding salt to the pools that do not require that lifting. The heaviest our boxes go is about 35 lbs (I told her that 35 is perfectly fine)- but I only ask that you be completely honest in your abilities...we will work with you and give you extra help if you need it."
I got off the phone and nearly teared up. So many places I have applied catch wind about my situation at the Seaquarium and toss my seemingly noteworthy resume aside. I was horribly weak and feel behind at the Seaquarium- I could not lift as much and when I did- I was not fast.
There are PLENTY of other applicants who can bench press me and lift tanks, fish, and anything else without any thought. She could have taken any number of them, as their intern program is very competitive...but instead, she told me straight up that she knows my problems and she wants to work with me through it.
We discussed the summer term option- as she expressed interest in bringing me into summer term because of all my public speaking and outreach work (on top of my work at other intern programs). If I take it up, I would be in Milwaukee until August.
After our nice catch-up talk laying down the final details of my acceptance into the program, I hung up the phone and just kinda stood in the middle of our guest room dumbfounded. Did she really just say all those wonderful things....about me?
I think about the Miami Seaquarium every day. I think about how I felt like I lost my dream because of my own physical limitations. I thought about being on full scuba gear at the bottom of a killer whale pool, turning around and seeing her looking me dead in the eye...a 7,000 lb animal close enough to reach up and touch. The moment she looked at me I felt something, that I HAD to be here- this is what I was meant to do...then weeks later, I was heading back home to Ohio because a Dr took one look at me and said if I continued, I could seriously hurt myself...permanently.
After the dr's appointment I was forced to leave the internship- causing me to have serious doubts about my abilities...wondering if maybe the physical aspects of this job could be to much. When I got back to Ohio I had two options- I could turn emo, dress in black, and blog about the unfairness or life...or I could try to turn the lemon into lemonaid.I went to physical therapy...just to get a handle on things I could do to strengthen yet not further hurt myself. I also got a personal trainer and started working 2 times a week for 6 weeks. I am still working with this trainer and probably will continue to do so until the week I leave. It has helped a lot and I am able to move a lot smoother and handle heavy loads with more ease then I used to.
It would be a lie if I said that my time at the Seaquarium did not affect me. I miss them horribly. I think about my experiences there often and I just wish I could have completed it. But I am determined to not let it hold me back from my dream. A lot of people, who live their dreams, have issues they must battle- my strength is my own battle.
So needless to say, my internship in Milwaukee is a huge step for me. I am back in the field after almost a year of being away from working in it. I am excited, scared, and at the same time incredibly eager to push myself and show myself that I am incredibly capable of doing what I dream of doing. The only person that can take away their dreams is themselves...and I really believe that.
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